So, last Friday I wrote about how I found the most perfect jeans in all of jeandom. But then I went on to say that I did not purchase them because no way was I paying $80 for a pair of jeans. Unless they also did something magical like time travel or clean up Star Wars figurines.
$80 for pants? That’s just crazy, people. And if you told me you’ve paid $80 or more for your jeans in the past, I’d like to take this opportunity to look you square in your face and laugh. On the inside, I would. I’d never just do that to your face. That’d be plain rude. But inside? I wouldn’t be able to help it.
But the thing is, I REALLY wanted those jeans. So, I went back to the site and stared at them longingly. And I noticed that they were $20 off if you ordered them online. Which made them $60. Plus tax and shipping, which we all know would drive them right back up close to $80.
So, I thought, maybe I can find MORE discounts if I just wish upon a star.
And then the lovely lambs at retailmenot.com clued me in to a 30% off PLUS free shipping coupon – which, were I to use said coupon, would put the jeans at about $42. Truth be told, I still feel it’s a rather oppressive price for a mere pair of pants. But I reminded myself that they are the most perfect jeans in all of jeandom and so I committed.
And then when I went to check out, they were like, would you like to open a credit card with our store and save 30 MORE dollars? And, internet, I most absolutely did want to.
Before you get all up in arms about how ridiculous it is to open store credit cards and how it negatively affects your credit score, might I direct you to one of my earliest posts. Bottom line is, I have exemplary credit. I NEVER open store cards.
I’ve actually been wanting a store card to Coldwater Creek for some time, because their clothes are right up my alley but too expensive and with their cards they give you all kinds of discounts and coupons and stuff. And if you are patient, you can usually get stuff ridiculously discounted. And then you get $80 jeans shipped to your home for $12. Or say you really liked this fall jacket, and you didn’t have a fall jacket, and you thought, well, I just saved SO MUCH MONEY ON THOSE JEANS, it would make sense to get a steal on a fall jacket, right? And then you purchase this cute little $180 jacket for a mere $23.
I don’t know where to go with this one now. Mainly, I was just really really excited about my prowess at securing deep deep discounts into clothes I adore and I needed to brag about it.
So, the morals of the story are:
1) $80 is too expensive for jeans.
2) Go ahead and open a store credit card if you have exemplary credit, even if you don’t deserve exemplary credit.
3) Talk about the prices of things you bought in a really gauche way on the internet, but only if you distract readers with really cute unrelated pictures of your children at the end.
P.S. Coldwater Creek didn’t pay me for any of this. I just like their clothes. And I like getting them for cheap. And I sort of like bragging about that.